Wedding Cows & Kitale Train

I will be in Nairobi in October to marry a very modern young Kenyan professional woman. She has made a request I want to honor but know so little about - that as a respect of tradition that I pay cows to her father. That's fine with me, but I can find no information on how many would be appropriate. Too few and I embarrass her. Too many and I make a mockery of the tradition. How many would be a good symbolic gesture? Also, she lives in Nairobi but her family lives in Kitale. Normally she flies. I like trains and would like to take a train from Nairobi to Kitale if the service is adequate (doesn't have to be as good as Nairobi-Mombasa) but reasonably safe and comfortable to permit enjoying the scenery. (Thank you.)

I am a Canadian woman married to a Kenyan Man. I dont know how many cows your bride will be worth but I will check with my husband and see what he says. I imagine that because she is being married by a Western man, she will be traditionally deemed to be worth more cows then a woman married to another African. Also, gifts - and ;lots of them - for the family will be expected. these gifts dont need to be expensive or extravagant - the idea is that they come from overseas... you will be viewed as wealthy whether you are or arn't. When you see the poverty that many of your inlaws will be subject to you will understand why they think this way.
I would suggest cheap t-shirts - lots of them. Remember, she likely has 5 or 6 brothers and sisters and aunties and uncles with cousions everywhere. 30-40 gifts are probably a safe bet. Also, it sounds cheap but the dollar store with local paraphanelia is a great gift. Hats, bags, wallats, games act...
Oh, and be prepared. When Kenyans marry you can bet the whole village to show up...

I'll get back to you on the cows...

Congrats to you!!

Ideally, the lady discusses with her suitor and agrees on how much her bride price is. She then communicates to her clansmen who will want to negotiate upwards, whether one is a Mzungu or fellow African. The two parties agree and enter into formal agreement. Customerily, to nurture relationship, the cows are never paid in full so that the inlaws find reason to keep communicating with the groom. The lady will also be in a position to tell if the family would rather translate the heads of cattle to cash- which most families readily go for especially when they have cows of their own. Should you require to physically take cows, it is advisable to know the exact days the closest animal market is and to arrange to be there to purchase the cows- this will assist you to set a date on or after the day, for obvious reasons. If this girl takes tradition so seriously, she is the best person to discuss this with, because then she will understand that tradition requires the two of you to assign value- her worth.

Very informative, thank you, Florence. I was reluctant to ask her for fear of putting her in the middle or violating some custom, but will ask her. Our arrangements are completely modern but she thought the cow payment would be a nice gesture indicating to her family that I am interested in learning their culture, and I totally agree. For that reason, even though cash would be a lot simpler, I'll probably stay with payment in cattle. But it is nice to know the cash option exists. And I like the idea of being 1 cow short of the full payment. Nice touch. Thanks again.